Later on the focus expanded and I have also included the topic of womanhood, because female body goes hand in hand with her femininity. If a woman is constantly fighting against her femininity, there is no way for her to accept and love her female body. Femininity is a gift of nature, which makes life beautiful, joyful, loving, kind and cozy. Rejecting this gift leads to difficulties, confusion and suffering. Nowadays a lot of women experience difficulties to let their femininity blossom due to fear of being too vulnerable, weak and dependant. Another factor that plays a role here, is the common belief that a female should be proud when she is similar to a male – we compete with them, we go through fire and water, demonstrate how tough we are as if to state that we are more masculine than men themselves. But nature is nature; it doesn’t give us gifts by chance. In fact, femininity is something powerful, as is masculinity. Femininity is power; however it is a different power than masculinity. It isn’t better, neither is it worse, it is just different.
The idea of my project “Healthy Story” is to be your mentor in the journey towards better mental health, self-love and joy of life. With this goal in mind I have included a variety of topics, which I deem important for creating a happy and fulfilling life – body, emotions, thoughts, spirituality, sexuality, relationships, parenthood, psychology and psychotherapy.
The initial idea of “Healthy Story” was born in the fall of 2012. Back then my intention was to write a book: “The healthy story of one light girl”, inspired by the constant battle females are having against their own bodies. The book hasn’t been published yet (everything comes on its own time), meanwhile in the fall of 2013 the website Zdravaistoria.com was born (the Bulgarian version of Healthy Story), followed by Healthy Story in English in the spring of 2014. The initial focus was healthy weight loss, healthy nutrition and how to start loving your body. This is no longer the main focus of Healthy Story, however I still believe these topics are quite important – your body will be serving you throughout your whole journey on Earth, this is why it is so important to have a good relationship with it.
Femininity is closely connected to sexuality – if we are not mentally mature for our sexuality, we would have difficulties accepting our femininity as well. The woman, who rejects her sexuality, is actually a child, who hasn’t grown up and is now living in the body of an adult. Sexuality is the creative and constructive force in the world. It gives us stimulus, impulse, enthusiasm, cheerfulness and inspiration. But for some of us sexuality is scary, uncontrollable, confusing. We get embarrassed that someone sees us as a sexual object, we get scared that something bad might happen to us or we are terrified to let someone so close to us, because we might get rejected. We get confused also when we perceive someone as a sexual object; because the impulses of the body have to be under full control, right? Sexuality is deeply connected to our bodies and if it has become a habit of ours to live entirely from our heads, shutting the body out, no wonders that our sexuality suffers.
Relationship towards ourselves
When sexuality is blocked, our relationship towards ourselves suffers, as well as the relationships with the opposite gender. A woman or a man with psychological age of a 5-year-old is not looking for a partner, but for a Dad or a Mom instead. When we are in this state, we don’t take responsibility for our own lives, instead we wait for the prince or princess to come and save us. Once we find them, our whole life will fall into place or at least this is what we believe. But we really don’t realize that one single person cannot fill in our entire life. This abandonment of our own life in order to be in a relationship, leads to unhealthy relations, based on mutual dependency, in which we are not happy but at the same time we can’t walk away. At the same time others are so scared to commit, that we simply jump from one relationship to the next, suffering from loneliness all the time. It is great for a person to build the life they want day after day, enjoying all the beautiful things they have chosen and created for themselves. But it is even more beautiful when this journey is shared with an equal partner, who also creates their life with joy. This way each of the partners continues to go their path, but at the same time we are together – we support each other, share the moments of success and failure and learn from each other. This is why the biggest growth happens within a relationship.
Psychology and psychotherapy
Psychology and psychotherapy are important for our happy and fulfilling life, because they help us gain self-knowledge and self-development. With the help of psychology one can learn about themselves and the world around them, becoming more aware of their thoughts, emotions, behavior, impulses and desires. Gaining self-awareness can help a person grow. However, each of us has their limit to awareness as well as tendency to use unconscious copying strategies, which prevent us from reaching our consciously chosen goals. We all have suppressed emotions, we all get confused from times to times, face difficulties and many other and we often don’t know how to deal with them. And here is where psychotherapy comes to the rescue – the psychotherapist sometimes as a fellow traveler, sometimes as a mentor, sometimes as a witness, could help us see ourselves as we really are, accept and start loving all our bright and dark sides, as well as exchange our inadequate coping strategies with consciously chosen new models, which could bring us to creating the life we want. But let’s not expect the therapist to do all the work! It won’t be easy and we will have to put a lot of effort in the process!
Spirituality is also important. We could enjoy financial abundance and healthy sexuality, we could love our bodies and have a wonderful relationship, but as long as we hold only onto the material aspect of life, our souls will suffer tremendously. This pain of the soul sooner or later starts manifesting as a sense of meaninglessness, feeling lost and endless sadness. But if we make space in our life for spirituality, it will give us stability and firmness in this world of change. Spirituality is the deep wisdom that each of us has within. It is love, compassion, true care for the living creatures around us. It is the feeling of connectedness with all and everyone around us. Spirituality is the acceptance that each one has their own path in life and their own lessons to learn. And we all are equally important, no matter how different we are. Spirituality gives us inner strength, sense of purpose and a compass. But spirituality doesn’t exclude what is of the Earth, on the contrary – life is most beautiful and complete when spirituality and what is of the Earth go hand in hand.
Every person has the opportunity to be happy, to love and walk with confidence on his own path. “Healthy Story” is my contribution to this beautiful world. Even the fact alone that from an idea Healthy Story turned into reality and could be of use for someone, gives me tremendous joy. Of course, not everything goes smoothly all the time. There are some difficult times, creativity crises, desperation, moments when I ask myself “Why?” and “Is it meaningful at all?”, but this is part of real life of a human being – there will always be tests and challenges, as well as beautiful moments and joy.
And now is the time to say thank you to all of you – our readers, listeners, teachers, students, friends and colleagues.
Thank you for your feedback, for sharing, for the criticism, for your support, attention, time and trust.
DISCLAIMER: The information provided on this website is intended for general information only. It is not intended as medical advice.
You should not rely on any information gathered here as a substitute for consultation with medical professionals.