ABOUT ME

Education and qualifications
My name is Emiliya Tsaneva and I was born in the town of Veliko Tarnovo, Bulgaria, in 1988.
I graduated from the Foreign Language high school in Veliko Tarnovo, specialising in German and French.
I have bachelor degree in Arabic studies from the University of Sofia, Bulgaria, of which I have studied one semester in the University of Vienna, Austria.
Then I graduated as a yoga teacher from the National Sports Academy of Bulgaria and afterwards I gained qualification as teacher of the dance meditation practice “Live wave”.
After that I joined a master’s program in Psychology at the University of Veliko Tarnovo and two semesters of it I studied in the University of Izmir, Turkey. I have just graduated my master program in Psychology with my master thesis under the topic “Cognitive-behaviour therapy for bulimia”.
In the summer of 2015 I did an internship in psychotherapy in Dublin, Ireland, and completed a course in raw food mastery.
I am currently living in Dublin, Ireland.

My personal story with weight loss struggles and diets
I have had weight problems ever since I can remember myself. My Mom always used to tell me that I am just nicely curvy, but at the same time I would always hear a nasty comment from someone or another regarding my weight. I couldn’t understand what was going on and why I was like this, I just knew that I really love sweets, so I am simply greedy and can’t stop eating. When I was 10, I decided that I don’t want to eat living creatures anymore, so I became a vegetarian. Of course, my passion towards sweets continued, so when I became a teenager, I started thinking that because I was kind of fat, no one will ever like me, so I developed a passion towards diets and sports.

Between the age of 12 and 22 I tried all kinds of diets, herbs, pills and tea for weight loss, even laxatives… I was forcing myself to go running at the stadium, although back then I hated running from the bottom of my heart and I was doing it just in order to lose weight; I was doing roller-skating in hot weather, tying plastic bags around my legs and arms in order to sweat more; I was exercising like crazy; I was constantly counting all my calories; weighing myself every single day, sometimes even several times a day. Sometimes I had success in losing weight and I felt so proud of myself, but then I would gain the same weight back and I would feel like the most miserable being in the world.

Years went by, but I still couldn’t find the right diet. I thought that it is normal to constantly be on a diet and starve myself, until one day, while I was taking a walk with a good friend of mine in the old part of Veliko Tarnovo and I was feeling great, all of a sudden I felt such a weakness due to the starvation that I simply couldn’t stand on my feet anymore and had to sit in the street. Then my friend explained to me that what I was doing was extremely dangerous to my health and he also told me about a case, in which a girl wasn’t eating at all for quite some time and when she decided to eat something, her stomach couldn’t take it and the doctors in the hospital had to fight for her life. However, I didn’t pay much attention to his words back then… Years later I realized that this is what people call eating disorder and it has way deeper roots – it doesn’t depend only on how much you weigh.

the_idea
Sports

At some point I managed to learn to love sports, although sports as a discipline at school was always the most horrible subject for me! Now I really enjoy all kinds of sports, including running! I even managed to finish a half marathon! I used to train karate (for 6 years), modern ballet (half a year), kung fu (half a year), jogging (3 years), sport climbing (half a year), yoga (11 years so far while keeping in mind that yoga is not actually a sport), oriental dance (2 years), roller skating (12 years), swimming (17 years), figure skating (2 years), as well as the dance meditation practice Live wave (2 years).

1934959_1103067770521_3708440_n

Womanhood and depression
Besides the struggle with weight, diets and bad eating habits, I had struggled horribly to really accept and appreciate the reality of being a woman. I used to prefer wearing wide clothes in black and blue, I used to hate skirts, high heels, make-up, dresses, pink and I definitely perceived myself as a strong girl, who couldn’t stand silly girly stuff. I used to admire all the other girls with boyish behaviour and I couldn’t really stand the overly soft girly ladies. I used to believe that the outer look didn’t matter and the most important thing for a person is to be good and kind. I used to be too hard on myself, I was treating myself like a soldier and I was proud that I was able to endure all kinds of tough conditions. But I still wanted to lose weight.

At the age of 16 I reached the point, where I didn’t feel like living anymore. And no matter how many psychological books and books for self-help I was reading, I just couldn’t understand how relationships between people work, I didn’t feel understood and accepted from people my age and I was finding a sense of belonging and relief only in the company of animals and books. Thoughts of suicide were crossing my mind way too often, so I went to see a psychologist. Well, it wasn’t really the right psychologist for me, because she couldn’t really provide me with the help I needed, but I managed to get control of myself, because I didn’t want to hurt my family with my self-harm behaviour.

At the age of 18 I registered an animal welfare society and it became my purpose to live, which took the place of my suicidal thoughts and even pushed my weight loss obsession into the background. We managed to find a home for quite some stray animals and we even succeeded in publishing a colouring book for children, which is telling the story of where the stray animals come from.

Back then I wasn’t quite successful with dating – I was never able to find the right person for me or even if I did, he was either not interested in me at all, or he was in the process of moving to another country. Meanwhile I couldn’t get rid of people, whose attention I didn’t want, as well as people with psychological problems with a sexual aspect – exhibitionists and other aggressive types.

Copy of DSC03976

Healthy eating and spirituality
At the age of 20 I reached my highest weight ever. Soon after that I got allergic reaction towards dairy products and decided to go vegan. I started reading more and more about healthy nutrition and healthy lifestyle and soon my weight started to go back to normal. But then I started obsessing over eating only healthy foods.

At the age of 22 I entered a spiritual Indian centre, where I learned how to meditate and started taking better care of the spiritual aspect of my life. This centre gave me a lot, although it took a lot out of me at the same time – it took more than 3 years to get back to my normal life and start seeing the real world again, as well as to accept my womanhood and sexuality as something sacred and beautiful, not as something bad and dangerous.

Meanwhile I wasn’t interested in going on diets anymore, I was eating healthy without being extreme, my weight was within the healthy limits, I was doing sports because I liked it and because of the pure joy of doing sports, I had a lot of friends, I loved to read psychology books, I was trying to grow as a person as much as I could and I was crazy about positive thinking and meditation. I had the most wonderful man as a partner and a job I loved. I thought that my life was perfect, but very soon Life decided to give me another good lesson and all of a sudden I lost everything… including the purpose to live. And so I went back to my beloved depression.

Yoga and entrepreneurship
Then I joined a yoga teacher training course in the National Sports Academy of Bulgaria, which helped me a lot to get back on my feet again. I was 23 at the time and I registered a company for importing tachyons (to explain it shortly, let’s say crystals) and I devoted myself to its development. I was reading a lot of entrepreneurship literature and I was an extreme fan of positive unrealistic thinking, so I kept believing that my wonderful ex-partner would simply realize what a mistake he had done and would come back to me, as well as that my project would be successful, no matter that I wasn’t that good with calculations and marketing. Soon after that I created my project Healthy story.

At the age of 25 I realized that I never wanted to have anything to do with trade and my beloved tachyon project started feeling as a burden to me. I terminated the activity of the company and I finally managed to close down the animal welfare society, which didn’t have any activity for some years before that. And so I went to study in Izmir, Turkey, for 9 months.

At the age of 26 I finally realized that my ex-partner really wanted to live his life without me and the only thing I could do is to accept his choice and simply move forward. And I simply entered a state of deep depression again. Even Healthy story didn’t bring me joy anymore.

Psychotherapy
And then the sparkle of psychotherapy lit up. In Izmir all the classes I attended were related to psychotherapy, I was reading additional literature, my closest friend there was studying to be a psychotherapist as well, so she was showing me how to be stable, how to make decisions, to live my life for myself. Soon after that I met my own therapist – body psychotherapist, and started to learn that a person should live not because of something or someone, but for themselves. I learned that positive attitude is something good, but the blind positive thinking that has no roots in reality isn’t. I learned that my value as a person is not measured by my weight and that womanhood is a wonderful gift. I learned that life can be beautiful and joyful, as long as you take the responsibility to make it so. I learned that a person should take care of themselves on their own, and to not wait for others to remember to do it for them. I learned that it is necessary for a person to state their healthy boundaries, to say “no”, to ask for what they need. And although life is not a bed of flowers, and it has quite some challenges, it is definitely worth living…

I am still learning as all other human beings. I think there isn’t a moment in which a human being can say – yes, now I know! Because when you have already mastered one lesson, then soon enough there is something new to be learned. But this way it is more interesting and we have enough variety and excitement in our lives!

Thank you!

Emi

Raw-food-mastery-certificate (2)

свидетелство треньор по йога

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


+ 8 = 16

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>